A letter to your grandchildren: what to write, with examples

A letter to your grandchildren should tell them where they come from, share a few family stories only you know, pass on one or two values, and tell each of them, specifically, what you love about them. It doesn't need to be long. A page or two, in your own words, can become one of the most treasured things in the family.

This guide covers what to include, how to write for young and grown grandchildren, example letters you can adapt, and why recording your voice is worth the ten minutes.

Why write to your grandchildren?

Grandparents hold a part of the family story that no one else does. You remember your own grandparents, perhaps a different country or a different century, and you saw your children grow up. Your grandchildren are the end of a long chain, and you're the one who can tell them how it links together.

There's something else, too. Grandchildren often know their grandparents as gentle, older people. A letter lets them meet the younger you: the one who fell in love, took risks, made mistakes and got through hard things.

This is a kind of ethical will: a letter that passes on stories and values rather than belongings. It sits alongside the other letters in our guide on what to write in a goodbye letter.

What should you include?

Where they come from

Start with roots. Where were you born? Where were your parents from? Why did the family end up where it is? Include names, places and one detail for each that makes it real: the smell of your grandmother's kitchen, the bus you took to school, the reason you moved.

Family stories only you know

This is the treasure. Every family has stories that will vanish if no one writes them down: how you met their grandparent, the time the car broke down on holiday, what their mum or dad was like at six. Pick two or three and tell them properly, with the details.

Values, shown not told

"Be honest" is easy to skim past. A story about the time you handed back extra change, and how it felt, isn't. Choose one or two things you hope they'll carry, and show where you learned them.

Something about each of them

Even in a shared letter, give each grandchild a line or two of their own. What you notice in them. A moment you shared. Children remember being seen.

Love, plainly

End with the words. Grandchildren of any age want to hear them.

How do you write for young grandchildren?

If they're small, write to the person they'll become. Their parents can read it aloud now, or keep it until they're older.

• Keep the words simple and the sentences short.
• Describe who they are right now. They won't remember being four; you do.
• Tell one funny story about them, and one about you at their age.
• Leave the heavy history for a separate letter, or for when they're older.

How do you write for grown grandchildren?

Older grandchildren can take more. You can talk about hard times, about what you got wrong, about what you believe. Teenagers and young adults often want the honest version of your life more than the polished one.

• Be candid about mistakes. It gives them permission to make their own.
• Share something you've changed your mind about.
• Talk about love, work and money in plain terms.
• Ask them something. "I'd love to know what you think" invites a reply, or a conversation.

Why record your voice?

A letter on paper is precious. A letter in your own voice is something else again. Grandchildren who never knew you well, or were very young, often say they'd give anything to hear how a grandparent sounded.

You don't need equipment. A phone voice memo in a quiet room is enough.

1. Read your letter aloud

   Sit somewhere quiet, hold the phone a hand's width from your mouth, and read slowly. If you stumble, keep going. The stumbles are part of you.

2. Tell one story without notes

   After the letter, tell one family story off the cuff, the way you'd tell it at the dinner table. It's often the best part.

3. Label and share

   Name the file with the date and who it's for, and keep a copy with the written letter. Our guide to voice messages for family has more ideas on what to say and how to keep recordings safe.

If you're comfortable on camera, a short video works beautifully too. Our list of legacy video questions gives you prompts, and grandchildren can record the answers with you on their next visit.

What if you have grandchildren you rarely see?

Write to them anyway. Distance, family rifts or simply living far apart don't stop a letter from mattering. Keep it warm and free of blame. Say what you remember about them, what you hoped for them, and that the door was always open. A letter like that can mean a great deal to someone who grew up wondering what you thought of them.

What if they're not born yet?

Some grandparents write to grandchildren who don't exist yet. It sounds odd, but it works: a letter "to my future grandchildren" about the family, its stories and your hopes can be copied and given to each child as they arrive, with a personal line added.

Extra things to include

A few small additions can make a letter much richer:

• A family recipe in your handwriting, with a note about who taught you.
• Photos labelled on the back with names, places and years.
• The story behind an heirloom: a watch, a ring, a teapot. Who owned it, and why it matters.
• A simple family tree with a line about each person.
• A favourite song or book, and why.

Where Sealkept fits

Many grandparents hand their letters over in person, or keep them with family papers. That's lovely, and it's all you need.

If you'd like some letters to reach your grandchildren only if you're not there to give them yourself, Sealkept can hold them. A message can be a letter, a voice note of you reading it, a short video, or all three. You can record straight into the message in your browser, or upload what you've recorded on your phone. You address each message to a specific person. You check in on a schedule you choose, from weekly to yearly, with one tap or one click in an email. If you stop, there are reminders and a grace period, and then each grandchild gets an email with a private link to only their messages, where they can listen, watch and download a copy to keep. You can also have a message wait for a birthday, including the birthday a grandchild turns a particular age, such as 18. The full sequence, from missed check-in to delivery, is laid out on how it works.

Messages are encrypted at rest. Sealkept isn't a will and doesn't handle belongings, so keep anything legal with your solicitor or attorney.

Start with one story. The rest of the letter will follow it.