Tagged
17 guides from the Journal about family.
Writing9 min read
A letter before deployment is a just-in-case letter for the people you love, written so they have your words if you don't come home. Write one to each person, keep it short and specific, and leave it somewhere it will be found, alongside your military's own paperwork, such as a will, emergency contact records and life insurance beneficiaries.
For parents9 min read
Choose a guardian for your children by thinking about who shares your values, has the energy and stability to raise them, and already has a bond with them, then ask that person directly and name them in your will. Keep care and money separate if that suits your family, and leave a letter so the guardian knows your children the way you do.
For parents8 min read
A good letter to your grandchildren tells them where they come from, shares a few family stories only you know, names one or two values you hope they'll carry, and tells each of them what you love about them. Write separately for young and grown grandchildren, keep it to a page or two, and record yourself reading it so they can hear your voice.
Writing10 min read
A good letter to your parents thanks them for specific things, not general ones: a meal, a drive, a sentence they said at the right time. Write one to give now while you can watch them read it, and, if you want, a short just-in-case letter that tells them what they gave you and gives them permission to keep living well.
Practical9 min read
If you die without a plan, your pet usually passes with the rest of your belongings, and whoever deals with your estate decides what happens to them. A pet care plan fixes that: name a carer and a backup, write a care sheet, leave money for their care through your will or a pet trust, and carry a wallet card so someone knows there's an animal at home.
Practical8 min read
Photos in iCloud or Google Photos stay locked behind your account when you die unless you plan ahead. Share a library with family now, add Apple's Legacy Contact or Google's Inactive Account Manager, and keep a labelled 'best of' copy on a drive someone can find. Curating and naming the people in them matters as much as access.
For parents12 min read
Ask your parents about their childhood, how they fell in love, their work, the hard times they got through, what they believe, their practical wishes and what they remember about you. Ask one topic per visit, record the conversation with their permission, and write the answers down afterwards so they can be shared.
Writing9 min read
A good reconciliation letter takes responsibility for your part in plain words, asks for nothing, and leaves the door open without pushing. If the person is alive and it's safe, consider sending it now, while they can answer. A letter left for after your death should only ever comfort, never settle scores or reopen wounds.
Writing10 min read
To record a voice message for your family, pick one person, choose two or three prompts, and talk for one to five minutes in a quiet, soft-furnished room with your phone a hand's width from your mouth. Save it as M4A or MP3, keep two copies in different places, and make sure it can reach them.
Practical8 min read
In the first 48 hours, get a medical certificate, tell close family, contact a funeral director, look for a will and secure the home. In the first week, register the death or order death certificates and start notifying people; in the first month, deal with banks, insurers, subscriptions, online accounts and probate.
Writing6 min read
The most useful approach is to write two documents: a love letter about your relationship, with a specific memory, what they gave you and permission to grieve and be happy again, and a separate practical note listing accounts, bills, documents and who to call.
For parents7 min read
A legacy video is a short, unscripted recording of you talking to your children or family. Pick three or four questions per video, such as what you were like at their age or what to do when life gets hard, record on a phone at eye level near a window, and keep each video between three and ten minutes.
Practical6 min read
A good executor is organised, calm, trusted by your family, likely to outlive you, and has actually agreed to do it. Ask them in person, give them time to think, and leave them a clear record of where your will, accounts and wishes are.
Writing7 min read
An ethical will, sometimes called a legacy letter, is a non-legal letter to your family that passes on your values, lessons, stories, gratitude and hopes rather than your possessions. It sits alongside a legal will, has no legal force, and can be anything from a paragraph to a few pages.
Practical7 min read
Keep originals of your will, deeds and certificates somewhere safe and known, list your banks, pensions, insurers and key contacts in one place, and tell your executor and one backup person where that list lives, without handing over passwords before they are needed.
For parents7 min read
Write a letter to your child by choosing one milestone for them to open it, such as their 18th birthday, then telling one small true story about them now, naming what you see in them, and ending with one hope and the plain words “I love you, I'm proud of you.” Store it somewhere that will still exist, and know the date, years from now.
Writing7 min read
A good goodbye letter is one honest page that includes a specific memory, what the person gave you, permission to grieve and live on, a small hope for their future, and the plain words “I love you”. Leave out old arguments, binding instructions and passwords, which belong in a separate practical note.
Start with one message to one person. You can add the rest whenever you're ready.
Write your first messageSet up in a few minutes · $5 a month, cancel anytime